What's your take...

Hi to the 4 of you! Hope things are good with you all. Kerry and I are still on honeymoon in Jamaica. It's such a lovely place. In the resort we have been treated like royalty. The weather has generally been brilliant; it's always warm but we have had some rain and today some pretty strong winds. I guess that's what happens when there are hurricanes about. However, the predicted path for Ike shows that we should be safe enough. Married life is amazing so far and we are just enjoying as much time together, as possible, before we head back to the "real world" and all that it entails. Kerry is having a lie down to try and get rid of a splitting headache so I have vacated the room to give her a bit of space and to remove the noise. If I'm being honest I needed to clear my heady anyway, reading The Shack takes its toll on a person.

Just thought I would ask you all a quick question. Who do you think this lady is?

4O years on...

I was talking with a guy yesterday who, in October this year, will have been married for 40 years. He and his wife were both married at age 22. As I am getting married this year I asked what his advice would be as I start out on the road of marriage. His advice was incredibly simple and genuine, as tears welled up in his eyes as he encouraged me to do what he had said. Always tell your wife that you love her and always keep communication open! Be expressive and be approachable! Be affectionate and open! Say you love her and show her you love her by being available and accessible. Don't zone in on TV, or other pursuits, all the time and leave no room for your wife to know, and feel the knowledge, that she is your ultimate pursuit. I was quite challenged by this guy.

He shared with me the story of his daughter who got married, and a week into the marriage had her husband tell her that the romancing was over, it was time to get on with things. He added quickly that the situation had changed, and that they were now in a romance-filled and committed marriage. However, he used that as a springboard into the advice that once you get married the romance doesn't end but simply begins! It is the beginning of making every effort to woo your wife and to surround her with love, encouragement, protection, and everything she may need to be all that she can be for Jesus! It's the beginning of loving her as Christ loved the church. Caring for her needs and desiring her good above your own. There is a big call, and challenge, upon us as men in many areas of life. Especially in marriage. We are called to make sacrifices in almost every sphere of our lives. In marriage, however, the sacrifices are sweet as they are opportunities to show and express your love to your love. I don't think I am an unrealistic guy, making these sacrifices, I know, will not always be easy; sometimes we are going to want to get our own way; sometimes we may not feel like expressing those things, but that is not the point. The point is that we have entered into covenant so we keep on doing those things, and after 40 years my encourager says keep on going; keep telling her you love her; keep talking to her; be accessible for her to talk to you; romance her; and never give up! Good advice I think!

The Real John Piper

I know what you're thinking... my music taste has changed, I have discovered a deep sense of appreciation and liking of Eminem, and am about to "bust a groove" to the tune "Would the real Slim Shady please stand up", except to the words "would the real John Piper please stand up"? I can happily, and hastily, inform you that I am NOT thinking such thoughts!

So, you might be thinking, what's with the title of the post? Over at the Desiring God blog, Abraham Piper has posted his introduction that he gave to his dad, John Piper, at the very recently concluded Desiring God Pastor's conference. The conference was titled "Pastors as Fathers and Sons", or something close to that anyway. Each year at the conference John Piper gives a biographical message, and this year it was on his father, Bill Piper, who died in March 2007(it was the death of his father that prompted the conference theme). Abraham Piper introduced John Piper before the delivery of that biographical message. You can read Abraham's introduction here.

Why comment on the introduction? Simply this, when I listen to John Piper I tend to be blown away by his love for Jesus, the Bible, people, and, combining those, his passion for people to be living their lives according to the Bible so that Jesus may be glorified in, and through, us and that other people may see, in one of countless ways, that He is glorious, as our joyful obedience points toward His immeasurable worth! Now, let me CLEARLY state, this is not a worship session of John Piper, or an elevation of him to the heights of perfection, not at all! I do remember that Romans 3v23 is in the Bible! However, I have no problem in stating the fact that I have a great respect for the man and have learnt, and continue to learn, much from his teaching and example.

So... the point in the post? The undeniable lesson that it takes much more to define a man than a ministry. Great talent and gifting does not mean great character. Knowing the right things to say does not mean that you strive to be the right person to the right people. It is a confirmation that to learn who I really am, and what I am really like, you do not need to hear me preach, but you do need to talk to Kerry. Now, I hope that I am true and faithful while preaching, or ministering in some way to people, but I can fool people just as well, if not better, than anyone. Now, of course, it is possible to fool Kerry, but much less possible. I like Abraham Piper's introduction because it makes me wonder what Kerry would say about me, or what my kids (if the Lord blesses) will say about me. Will they be able to say that I am there for them, that I love them, that I taught them about grace and justice, that I was faithful to them? Will they be able to say that I made sacrifices for their good and enjoyment? Will they be able to say that I was, and am, concerned for God's glory? Concerned, and interested, in academic development? Will they be able to say, that among many things, "it’s best, for me, at least, that he’s a dad. I admire him." Kerry and I get married this summer and I hope someday she can say those things, apart from being the father to her part obviously. I hope she, and others, can say it, not to make me feel big and proud, but because it means I will have been of benefit to them and that it would be a sign of me striving to be all that I can be as a Christian man, husband and father! O Lord, may it be so!

As a confirmation, the comments on Piper led me to examine and question myself, not compare myself in any way.

It's OFFICIAL!!

As I am sure you, the three people who read this blog, have already heard... Kerry and I got engaged. On Thursday past (the 12th July) at Crawfordsburn Country Park, I got down on the one knee and asked Kerry would she do me the greatest honour and give me the greatest privilige and pleasure in consenting to be my wife... and she said yes. Any of you who know Kerry will know how blessed and fortunate I am for her to say yes!! We are making arrangements at the minute and although no date has been set we are hoping for the end of August/ start of September 2008. I think I speak for both of us when I say that we are busting for it to come around and that we would value your prayers as we make the plans, and prepare ourselves to live as husband and wife in the model shown to us in the relationship between Christ and His bride, the church.
On this note, I would like to thank any of you reading this who have made a point of making Kerry and I a point of prayer. We have valued it greatly, and may it continue into this new stage of our relationship together.

Congratulations!

Kerry has graduated! The graduation ceremony was to be on Wednesday 4th July, but as that clashed with Kitchy's (Kerry's brother) wedding, Kerry was unable to attend. So, to mark the occassion, Kerry's proud parents (in the picture) held a "fake graduation" to celebrate her success!
Kerry is probably the most diligent, determined, studious person I know. Kerry Kitchen doesn't believe in doing things with anything less than 100 per cent of effort and application. Kerry's university success, of graduating with a high 2:1 degree, is not based on three years of work in Queens University, but has been the culmination of years of diligent study and application in the area of academics.
So, congratulations Kerry! Let's be sure that we pray that God would guide Kerry very clearly as she navigates her way through this next stage of life! I'm very very proud of you Kerrs!